"Mens sana in corpore sano is a contradiction in terms, the fantasy of
a Mr. have-your-cake-and-eat-it. No sane man can afford to dispense
with debilitating pleasures; no ascetic can be considered reliably
sane. Hitler was the archetype of the abstemious man. When the other
krauts saw him drink water in the Beer Hall they should have known he
was not to be trusted," Max, quoting A.J. Liebling.
And what a fitting quote to sum up the near-Roman excesses of this weekend's event. This past Sunday, the Cheese Diaries hosted the first (of hopefully many) East Bay tasting event. I use the term hosted loosely - it was Anne who did all the hard work - providing her home, and waking up at the crack of dawn to bake baguettes.
After my personal Camembert de Normandie connection fell through, I schemed to bring it to me. I found a source, and ordered it, along with another forbidden cheese, Langres. To celebrate the momentous occasion, ten guests were chosen to partake of these cheeses, along with a few of our favorites. Upon arrival, the task was clear: an inadvertent (and unabashedly un-American) tour of France, with a brief introduction to Italy.
A side note about membrillo: Although it's relatively simple to make, don't bother. It will make a mess of your kitchen, spattering and sticking to the stove, the counter, the floor, the ceiling and your beloved copper double boiler.
This one was a bit riper than the one I'd reviewed... it was runnier and sweeter. It was so runny at room temperature that it was eaten with a spoon, and earned itself the nickname the "fondue cheese", although fondue is usually made with melted Gruyere, Emmenthaler or Comte and kirsch.... but that's a different article. We paired it with Louis Jadot (wings! little wings!) Beaujolais. It was also terrific with the figs, and balsamic vinegar caramelized onions.Max thoughtfully brought a couple bottles of Normandy cider. With slices of Pink Lady apples, and Marcona almonds, it was perfect... one of those culinary moments when you have to recline and let your eyes roll back. This has to be my favorite cheese.
This is what eating Camembert de Normandie is like.
The ciders were Eric Bordelet Sydre Brut Tendre and Doux. The sweet, tantalizing acidity of this beverage did well to balance out the salty richness of the Camembert, and was a refreshing change from all the wines we had been drinking.
Jean d'Alos, the famous affineur of France, says that raw milk does not guarantee the quality of a cheese. Maybe not, but when raw milk cheeses are good, they blow away just about any pasteurized version. There is an incredible complexity of flavor that just can't come from pasteurized milk- try tasting pasteurized and non-pasteurized milk side by side and you'll be amazed by the difference. In other words, there is nothing like the real thing, Camembert de Normandie. It alone makes a strong case for enforcement of g.i.s.
When buying Reblochon, you have to be very careful. The ones available here have been aged for just over sixty days (it's made with raw milk), and Reblochon really hits its peak at about 50-55 days. I've tasted more than a couple dried-out Reblochons.
I've been struggling with the term "barnyardy". When I say that word, I try to close my eyes and conjure up the most romantic barn I can think of: a rustic barn in the south of France, walls built of ancient stone. Inside, there are cows chewing fresh, sweet hay, mooing softly in the early morning light that streams in from the windows. Chickens run free, pecking in the crisp straw for bugs...
Still, thinking about eating *that* doesn't exactly whet the appetite. There's no getting around it, though. This cheese has a definite meaty, sweaty, animal quality to it. If I had to actually describe the barn that comes to mind when eating this cheese... well, let's just say it wouldn't exactly be mouth-watering. At least until you've tasted this cheese.
We ended up drinking this with a Chandon Blanc de Noirs sparkler. The tradition of pouring it on top is no longer in fashion, and in fact the Langres did not appear to have much of a concave shape. Nevertheless, we honored the tradition.

It was an odd combination, the cold bubbling wine congealing the soft cheese. For taste, I would have prefered a deeper wine. Jenkins (author of The Cheese Primer) suggests a Rhone red with French prunes, which in a last minute effort tried to find but failed.
In order to do this cheese justice, I decided to taste it again, this time both myself and the cheese unadulterated with alcohol, and compare it head to head with the Epoisses. The Langres has a much more subtle, complicated flavor, while the Epoisses has that overwhelmingly barnyardy quality. The Langres is sweeter, delicate, more golden in flavor. The smell experience holds the same joy as freshly baked breads. The creamy aftertaste suggests truffles soaked in honey, but there is an odd floral quality to it as well, balanced out by its more musky essence.
Epoisses is bold, the aggressive socialite. Nothing is hidden, all is revealed. Langres is coy, winking from darkened corners and smiling secretly under bedsheets.
Good thing too, because when our tour was complete, the carnage was apparant... a broken table, a stinky dining room, 9 empty bottles of wine and ten aching but happy and bloated tummies.
"Zack," I said the next day. "We were pretty inebrieted."
"Yes, honey. You were pretty inebrieted," he replied.
"Do you remember anything about broken furniture?" I asked.
"In fact, I do. But Max said you and Anne wouldn't remember. I agreed" he laughed. "It was as we foresaw it."
"Oh. It's a good thing you drove home that day."
As I passed out on our couch, I couldn't help but think that Steingarten's analysis of the aftereffects of choucroute applied equally well to my situation. "[Y]ou... lie immobile in a netherworld between sleep and wakefulness for the next eighteen hours. Then you can eat again. The French would call this a liver attack, but they call everything a liver attack." (from The Man Who Ate Everything)
We'll do it again, for sure. I'm confident that our guests had a good time Justin declared that "these are like, ten of my favorite cheeses now!". Next time, we'll stick to more specific regions - I'm a huge fan of the Loire. Spanish cheeses also intrigue. Anyone know how I can get ahold of some Torta del Casar?
About that table... when my sister commented about it the next morning I replied in jest, "One of my drunken friends musta busted it." Later that night I mentioned it to Ryan who came over to make dinner. I could tell he was looking at me funny.
"What," I demanded.
"You really don't remember, do you," he replied, smiling in sweet irony. Turns out I, at least in part, was to blame. Doh!
Inebriation, sadly, does not enhance one's memory of taste. Next time, I'd say less wine and more cheese. If we structured the cheese and wine pairing more tightly, I think we can manage to have several cheeses with each glass.
There is so much to taste and explore! I am particularily interested in comparing and contrasting related cheeses. I can't wait for the next round- but I guess I'll have to wait until we've all recovered a bit. In the meantime, I'll just nibble on this left over Epoisses.